Family Circus

I wanted to get this one down before I forgot. Another Oliver incident that just confirms my opinion that small humans are the grossest entities on the planet.

Today Oliver spent an unusually long time sitting on the toilet, door open, singing away. When he was finished, he dismounted I should say, as he is rather small in relation to the toilet, and checked out the contents. With great enthusiasm he ran to the door of the bathroom, "Hey, guys. Check out the size of these logs!"
I thought someone was going to lose an eye or limb the way the children clawed past each other to be the first to the toilet. Oliver stood by, chest swelled, ready for compliments.
"Wow, those are huge."
"Look how many there are!"
Just as I came around the corner and hollered for everyone to get out and get back to work (they were practicing instruments, or had been rather), Charles leaned over the toilet and took a deep whiff.
"And the smell, Oliver is horrible."
Oliver could hardly take it he was so entirely gratified.
"Really, Charles. Do you think it is the smelliest ever?"
Charles reflected for a moment, " No. Not the smelliest."
Oliver was crestfallen, but then Charles went on, " But I think it is very close."
"Wow, it's almost the smelliest ever!" Oliver was jubilant. I shooed everyone out and flushed the toilet. I think Oliver was wanting to save the trophies for awhile.