Daily Diary

Today I decided that I should be a mom and housekeeper and thus gave myself the day off from my campaign director job- besides contacting Alan Keyes and setting up a radio interview for Martin with American Vision, and answering some Ann Coulter chat questions. Other than that, I spent the day doing laundry, dishes, preparing food (for the next couple days) and cleaning out storage closets. I had to leave the house at 4:30 to take Jonathan to a 6pm birthday party off of 85 in Gainseville! Yikes. That was a labor of love. But what was worse is that at 4:15 amidst running around throwing a last load in the dryer and checking on the crockpot (I fixed chicken and rice to take to my mother-in-law's for tomorrow night's dinner since she is watching the kids all day), I told Caroline that we were leaving in 15 minutes, as soon as I was out of the shower and dressed. So what does my incredibly useful child do? She goes and sits in front of the TV for 15 minutes, not even mentioning to the other four kids to get on their shoes, etc. Gabriel, of course, loaded his diaper, Charles was sound asleep, Jonathan was wearing sloppy shorts and an undershirt, and Oliver- well he was just watching TV looking rather vegetative with bare feet. When I got downstairs fresh and happy, I took one look at the room full of slackers and Mt. St. Mom erupted. 15 minutes later we were on the road with somber children reflecting on the meaning of "we are leaving in 15 minutes." Vivian, having had a long, deep sleep was in high spirits, clinging to her blankie and chewing on her dolly with gleeful noises. It contrasted sharply with the mood of the car.

We got to the party a little after 6, dropped off Jonathan, and then I reflected on what to do with 5 children for two hours in a strange part of town. I spotted a Wendy's and decided to feed the kids dinner there. Charles said that Wendy's was not dinner food, it was only lunch food, and he would prefer spaghetti. There was an italian restaurant across the parking lot, and quite frankly, I would have preferred spaghetti, but we were out voted.

After spending an hour watching the kids pick at their food and play with their toys, we headed back to the Laser Tag place. By the time we got Jonathan at 8, and were back home at 9, the idea of a Corona and quiet was exceedingly- EXCEEDINGLY- appealing. I think that I'm beginning to average 5 glasses of wine or beer a week. How long, at that rate, would it take to get a beer gut. I might have to dig up the Billy Blanks tapes, and start doing those every morning, besides the jumping on the trampoline work out program.

Our latest camping trip

I have been totally swamped making up for lost time working on the Human Rights Amendment, but I thought that I should take a few moments and jot down the details of our latest camping adventure.

Wednesday morning, we finally pulled out of the driveway at 8:30am. Usually we leave sooner, but because there isn't really a full time housewife in operation, laundry had to be done, and a good deal of packing last minute. We decided to take 20 across the state to 985, and from there head north. Within 10 minutes of leaving our house, and driving down 575 at 70 mph, the tire light went on. Jon and I just figured it was a weather fluke and not truly related to tire problems. But then we started hearing a funny sound and seeing smoke. The back passenger tire looked to be flat and melting. We pulled over as fast as we could (with a very large pop-up in tow, mind you) in an area that thankfully had a nice wide shoulder.

The tire was destroyed, and it was a brand new, top of the line tire, too! I took out my camera, took a picture of the tire, and then my camera died. Apparently the battery was low. So there are NO pictures of this camping trip! Jon had just gotten AAA coverage about 10 days previous, so he opened up his wallet, took out his card and made the call. We were assured by the man on the other end of the line that within 1 1/2 hours they would be at our service. That explained the cheap rates. Though our tradition is to stop at Cracker Barrel for breakfast whenever we head out on a road trip, it was apparent that there would be no Cracker Breakfast happening anytime soon, so I handed out sliced bread and water bottles to the kids.

Jon and Jeremy ( a friend who joined us for the trip) took inventory of tire changing equipment, and decided to get started rather than wait for help. Thanks to a tire theft safety system on the tires of 2004 Suburbans, (a feature, not a bug), it took the boys 1 1/2 hours to change the tire. Jon called off AAA, and headed to the nearest Tires Plus. By noon, we were back on the road, heading toward Asheville, only by a different route.

The bread and water held everyone over until about 2pm, and then they were sure death by starvation was right around the corner. Besides, I didn't want to show up at the campsite with 6 hungry, crabby campers. We stopped at a Cracker Barrel and had lunch (the kids stuck with their pancakes and bacon).

We made it to Asheville by about 5:30 and headed for Ridgecrest and registration. We found our campsite without a glitch, and except for being in the center of the camp rather than off to the side with tree coverage, it was a very satisfactory spot. Jon set to work taking the bikes off the camper, and Jeremy headed off to set up his tent with Jonathan's help. The bike racks proved to be efficient at holding the bikes, and obstinate in letting them go. Just when we were about to pull out my pocket knife and cut the last bike from the rack, our guardian angel stepped in and the bike was freed!

That job over, we started putting up the Pop-up and were most pleased with the speed and efficiency of that process. Finally, something was going right. Jon pulled out the water hose, hooked it up to the spicket, and voila! Our Camper began to fill rapidly with water, and every spicket and pipe leaked with hissing, rapid efficiency. In a panic, I yelled for him to turn off the water and raced to grab blankets to mop up the flood. Jon finally got the water off and then we surveyed the damage. Do you understand the frustration of waking at 6am after going to bed late. Working yourself to a sweat, packing up car and camper, getting a flat tire, driving all afternoon, setting up camp, and having yet another major disaster all with six needy children vying for your attention and care the entire time? We were at a low, very, very low point. Then we checked our watches and realized that if we didn't leave for dinner at that moment, we would miss it entirely.

We yelled to the kids to get back in the car, mopped up the remaining water and left two big blankets in a soggy heap on the picnic table, and decided to go have dinner and try to forget about it.

You might, perhaps think that this was the end of our misadventures for this fine day, but you would be mistaken. Dinner was good, and we had the cafeteria to ourselves since everyone else had eaten and was headed to the conference area. We made it into the auditorium in time for the debate. After seating the family, Charles looked at me in disgust and said, " I thought we were camping. What is with this?" I realized that I had failed to communicate the conference part of the camping trip. Oops.

About 10:30 we stumbled back into camp. Jeremy bid us goodnight and headed for his tent, and we tried to boost up our energy to get 6 little humans bathed and in bed. Since it was clearly dark, the first thing was to hook up electricity. I had not brought lanterns, but merely little flashlights for the kids, because the camper is well equipped with lighting. The cooler no longer contained ice, so it was getting rather urgent that we be able to use the refrigerator. We plugged in the main electrical cord and......nothing happened. We checked all the fuses. We reset the electrical. We flipped any and all switches on that camper. We read the owners manual (which was not entirely accurate because it was for a similar camper a year previous to our model, and a photocopy version- we bought the camper used). We had a friendly neighbor come over and check all the outlets. Meanwhile the children were busy biking in the dark around the camp ground, and Vivian and Gabriel were as fussy as they could possibly be. Vivian needed a bottle, but of course no electricity meant no electric kettle meant no hot water for formula. I headed for the bath house and fixed it with hot tap water. We gave up on the electricity, and I was beginning to marvel at how tent camping had been a lot less complicated. We gave up on bathing the kids, and instead scrubbed everyones feet in a basin (Charles the nasty, went last, since his feet are by far the grossest), washed hands and faces in the bathhouse, brushed teeth, and put everyone to bed.

Once we got into bed, we made a new discovery. A train track ran not more than 25 feet from our camper along the side of the campground, hidden by trees and shrubbery, which did not by any means mask the noise. The hissing and churning greeted our ears every hour or two, with the occasional booming horn. Gabriel whimpered a few times, but I hissed at him in no uncertain terms that if he woke up Vivian or in any other way interrupted what little chance of sleep that remained to me, his life would most certainly be in great jeopardy. He must have believed me, because he pulled his covers over himself, and went back to sleep.

The next morning we discovered the electrical switch under the sink, which was the magic button for power, and we gave up on the water entirely, until someone who knew what they were looking at, could look at our pipes.

The next two days were uneventful, relaxing and very nice. By Saturday, we were sad to be heading home, and as we settled into our beds Saturday night, we were a little sad not to feel the breeze coming through the camper screens, and missed hearing the scampering of the little animals, and the sounds of the churning, hissing, night trains.

Daily Diary

This morning Jon and I realized that we are out of clean underwear, there's no more coffee, and no more toilet paper. I looked at Jon and thought about that for a moment. "We really need a wife," I said. Jon having read the book of right answers gave me a big squeeze. "You are my favorite wife. And it makes it more interesting wondering if there's going to be toilet paper when you are in the bathroom, or gee, is there going to be coffee this morning? Better yet, think what a wonderful thrill I get on the mornings I open my underwear drawer and there is another pair of clean boxers," and we both laughed very hard. I married the greatest guy ever!

Daily Diary

Friday was Jonathan's last day at Classical school and he had a huge history exam. He studied very hard and was quite frankly stressed out about it. On the way to school I just couldn't resist telling him that if he didn't do well on the exam, Mr. G would hold him back the following year. He took the news rather calmly and said, "Well, that's nice. Now I feel much better about it." When we got to the school parking lot, I did let him know that I was only kidding. His calm restrain disolved and every tick in his little body came out in full force. He began wrapping his arm around the seatbelt shoulder strap and unwrapping it, mopping his hair with his hands, and writhing around in general. "Mom!" he yelled totally exasperated.

"Yes?" I responded as if I had no clue what he was talking about. "Why do you do this to me?" he asked. "Why do you still fall for it?" I answered, and added "I must say I'm rather impressed with how calmly you took that news." Jonathan thought about this for a moment still exhibiting the nervous ticks. He unwrapped himself from the seatbelt, smoothed his hair over and reflected. "You know you love me," I said with a huge grin. "Besides," I continued," Don't you feel rather non-chalant about the exam now?" Jonathan thought about that for a moment and then his face broke into a broad grin. "Yeah, I have to say I do."

That afternoon when I picked him up the entire class was in a general state of intoxicated exuberance. "The exam was easy!" everyone was rejoicing- course it was probably because they all studied hard all week. Jonathan and Benjamin came running over to me. "Mom, can I spend the night at Benjamin's house?" Jonathan asked. I thought about that for a moment. I figured he had earned it. "Ok."

He ran off to throw his stuff in the suburban and jumped into Benjamin's car. I walked over to talk to Benjamin's dad. Over the course of the parent chat I discovered that Benjamin's parents would be gone for a couple hours that evening, and their older son would be babysitting, and they had a pool in the back yard. My heart sank at the thought of the pool. Jonathan tends to panic in the water, and then he needs to be rescued. But I had already said yes, and didn't want to go back on my word. So, I emphasized that the boys were not to swim unless there was an adult right there, and no swimming while the parents were gone. I also took Jonathan aside and said the same thing. Then they were off.

I followed up this conversation with a mom in the parking lot going over general kid horror stories and the need for being able to swim well. I also remembered that Jon had woken up that morning in the midst of a nightmare about drowning. Jon never has nightmares, so that was a little strange. The more I thought, the more I panicked and in short order had myself in a general state of hysteria.

I decided that I had to go and pick up Jonathan immediately if not sooner. He could in fact at that very moment be in the middle of the pool going into a panic attack and drowning. This was highly unlikely as he probably hadn't even arrived at Benjamin's house yet, but nonetheless I threw the kids in the car, and was on my way.

I must confess a pang of sheepishness when I turned into their driveway. Benjamin's mom came out. "Hi," she said very nicely but clearly a little surprised to see me. I stammered a wee bit and confessed my general state of neurosis when it comes to the safety of my children and my rather extreme fear of losing one of them to a drowning incident. She shrugged. "Well, whatever." Jonathan came out of the house very sad to see me. I told him to go play for an hour and we would just stay in the yard and wait for him. They live on a large property so there was plenty for the kids to run around and do. Benjamin's mom stayed outside and chatted with me. After about 30 minutes the kids all complained that they were so hot and couldn't they please go swimming. It was decided that since we didn't have swim suits, it would be all right for them to sit on the side of the shallow end and simply dip their feet in.

Pam had been planning on swimming so she jumped right in and then helped Caroline into a raft that she could paddle around the pool without getting wet. I settled along the shallow end of the pool with Vivvie on my lap, Oliver and Gabriel on either side, and Charles a little farther down. There was a ledge running along the inside of the pool and our feet rested on this ledge. Caroline was having a terrible time trying to paddle, so Pam swam over and started demonstrating the general technique. I became rather absorbed in the lesson, and was highly amused watching someone else trying to break through the fog of confusion that seems to surround Caroline any time learning is on the agenda.

I'm not certain how much time passed but Oliver suddenly said," Hey, mom, look at Charles." I turned and looked and there was Charles about a foot under the water, standing on the floor of the pool, motionless with his eyes closed. The water above him was completely still. I went into panic mode instantly, stood, put Vivvie on my hip and walked along the ledge bending toward Charles so as to grab him by the arm. I was calculating in my mind how long he had probably been under water, and how hard it would be to pull him out, but fearing there wasn't time to set Vivvie safely on the patio, I reached for him while holding her. Somehow I lost my footing, plunged into the pool, Vivvie and I both went completely under, and in the process I pushed Charles behind me, farther from the side of the pool. I was still calculating how much time I might have to rescue him, and trying to recall proper CPR technicque. I came up with Vivian and she immediately started spluttering and screaming so I knew she was ok, and then I reached for Charles and dragged him to the side and stood him up on the ledge. He was able to stand, and was looking at me with large eyes. I paused waiting to see if he had taken in water or if he would be able to gasp for air. After a moment he gasped for air, and I sighed relief. Charles couldn't decided if he should feel that it had been an interesting experience or start bawling and curl up in the fetal position. He finally decided that it was an interesting experience he would rather never repeat and sat on the side of the pool recovering.

As Pam had left us by the side of the pool, dressed and dry, she had come over in shock now that three of us were drenched. "What happened?" she asked, probably thinking there was something weird about this family and swimming pools, so maybe it was a good thing I had come for Jonathan. I said I had no idea, that Charles was suddenly a foot under, and I lost my footing rescuing him. I had a rather large scrap on my knee and shin, but other than that all was well. Vivian had even quit screaming but was holding my arm very tightly. Benjamin ended up spending the night at our house, and when we got home, I demonstrated to Charles what he should do next time he finds himself submerged in water. Because the close your eyes tight and be really still plan is only a good idea if you want to drown.

Daily Diary

I have been working on the careful indoctrination for respect for women in my sons nearly since their births. One day Jonathan came to me excitedly and said, "Mom, did you know women should not ever be in the military?" To which I responded, " That's interesting dear. Who told you that?" HIs eager answer, " Uncle Ben."

I stopped what I was doing and looked at him," and did Uncle Ben tell you why women have no place in the military?" Jonathan paused, reflected and looked rather confused. "No," he admitted. "Well, I'll tell you. You don't send the best of society out to die in battle."

The lessons have continued with the emphasis on opening doors for girls, the need to protect girls always, carrying heavy loads for their sister. Caroline had been hit by a boy at church once and I asked Jonathan why he hadn't beat the kid up for that. He responded that the kid was really big and he would have been dead to challenge him. I let Jonathan know for future reference that he better have a bloody nose and a busted lip trying to defend his sister or he'd be answering to me and Dad later.

Charles has been soaking all this information up. Yesterday we stood in the yard reflecting on the weeds and some other grass issues in the front lawn. He asked me a question about it and I replied that he'd have to talk to his Dad about that as I didn't know the answer. Here's his response: "Yeah. Girls don't know much, but they are very special."

Daily Diary

Yesterday afternoon I picked up Jonathan from school, then we headed to Tires Plus, which is about 2 1/2 miles from our house. We dropped off the car to get an oil change and 4 tires, and then walked home.

We hadn't gone very far when Oliver said," I really got to go to the bathroom, mom." "Oliver," I responded annoyed, "there isn't a bathroom anywhere. You'll have to wait." We were walking past some woods. "Look at all the trees, mom. I could go potty by a tree." I thought about that. "Ok." So I stopped the stroller in a shady area of grass, instructed the kids to stand right next to it, and then took Oliver over to a tree. While he was going, the rest of the kids were waving to cars going by. "Mom, we just saw one of your piano students!" exclaimed Caroline.

After about 3/4 of a mile, we paused in another shadey spot and got water bottles out. Charles was looking a little green. When we got back to walking, Charles patted my back and said, " Mom, I don't feel so good," followed by sudden puking. Fortunately he was on the sidewalk throwing up in the grass, and I stood by, patting him on the back. Oliver stood on his other side, watching in fascination. Charles threw up over and over for quite a long time as Oliver said the following:

"Wow, Charles!"
"Gee, Charles. I'm really sorry you are throwing up."
"Man, you're doing it just like a dog. That's really great!"
"Oh, man, you're really sick Charles. I'm so sorry."

I was laughing so hard, but silently and standing behind Charles so he wouldn't see me laughing. because the whole thing was so funny. There I am on the side of the road, kid in the back pack carrier, another in the stroller, and three kids watching another throw up in the grass. People were driving by waving at the kids, who waved back.

Charles finished throwing up, and we kept walking. Oliver was holding my hand and commenting on things the entire way. "Mom, I just saw a tarantula eat a scorpion." I looked down at his excited face. "Oliver, that is a complete lie." Oliver laughed and said," Yeah, but I thought it was pretty funny."

At one point there was a long stretch of fencing that clearly belonged to a single person, and this huge black lab kept barking and jumping up so his head just peaked up over the top of the fence. It was rather alarming it first, the dog being very excited, and clearly trying to make it over. But we realized soon that he just wanted to say hi. As we walked along the bobbing dog head followed until the yard ended and the dog was left behind scratching at a whole in the bottom part of the end of the fence and barking furiously.

I had been rather tired around noon-I haven't slept well in about 2 weeks-but when we got in the door, I was worn out. I gave Oliver and Gabriel some cookies, fed Vivian and put her down for a nap, and had Jonathan turn on cartoons for everyone. I decided to go take a nap since Jon was going to be home soon. I figured cartoons would keep the 5 kids quiet for awhile. When Jon got home he came into the kitchen where Gabriel and Oliver were happily polishing off the rest of the package of oreos. They had black rings completely around their mouth. "Hi, Dad. We're eating cookies!" Oliver announced. "Yeah, we eatin' cookies," Gabriel echoed happily. "I see that," Jon answered glancing at the empty package. "How many have you boys had?" Oliver said, "4" around a big mouthful. Clearly they had passed four a long time ago. Jon put the remnant away."Where's mom?" "She's sleeping," Oliver offered. And I didn't get up until 6:30 this morning.

Daily Diary

For those of you wondering where I'm putting the Paramount Right to Life Amendment when I already have an immense workload- well, here's the adjusted school schedule.
5:30 or 6-I check email, get dressed, Bible reading and prayer (that I don't lose my temper with Caroline! :-)
7:30am- breakfast, I get the kids up to the table, everything settled and then rush to the school room to work on HR 536 for a few minutes.
8:00am- Jonathan practices with Oliver (I was practicing with Oliver which was a disaster. Jonathan is getting much better results and has upped his allowance by taking care of this)
8:00am-I change diapers (Vivian and Gabriel) and dress the younger three. I set out Charles' clothes.
8:15am Charles practices viola, Vivian and Gabriel play in the nursery, I begin school work with Caroline.
8:30am-Gabriel comes to the school room, Oliver plays with Vivian in the nursery. Jonathan practices on his own.
9:30am- Viv goes down for nap. Caroline and I are still working one on one. By this time I'm reminding myself to remain calm and am determined not to ask her if her brain has yet joined us in the school room. Jonathan begins piano practice.
10- Jonathan joins the school room. Caroline works independently, I begin with Charles, and help Jonathan and Caroline as needed.
11:30-Charles is released from the schoolroom/torture chamber, and happily heads to the backyard to find bugs and lizards. I settle in with Jonathan for a few minutes to ascertain which school work is a sloppy half job, what questions need answering, and to explain his geometry lesson ( I do love geometry so this isn't painful).
12noon-lunch time. While the kids eat, I rotate loads of laundry, check email, make phone calls, feed Vivian, and change diapers.
12:30-Jonathan and Caroline pretend to be shocked that they must return to the school room. We work on languages: Latin, Hebrew, Greek and Spanish. Any time the kids are all working and don't need my help, I rapidly fire away at emails, or research for HR 536. When Caroline finishes, she heads downstairs to practice cello. Oliver and Gabriel watch a movie. Charles and I read together.
2pm-Quiet time for Oliver, Gabriel and Vivian. Caroline and I work on history. Jonathan pretends to have finished all his papers for the week.
3pm- School work is temporarily stopped and everyone does chores (everyone meaning Charles, Caroline, Jonathan and Me). Jonathan has kitchen duty, Caroline will help fold laundry or sweep and straighten the downstairs, Charles does some menial task not requiring much problem solving. If we are going to run an errand, I rip the sleeping children from their beds (which is rather painful as I would rather stay home and enjoy the silence) throw them into the car and get going.
6pm- for the first time I consider what scraps I can throw together, heat, and put on the table as supper. Since the oven broke in early May, my efforts are limited to stove, crockpot and microwave cooking. It is a good weightloss program.
After dinner, I generally head for the office to check email, make phone calls, write a press release or some other necessary thing, etc. Anything HR 536 related. I join the family for family worship (only the singing and Bible story part- I do not enjoy listening to them struggle through catechisms with Dad. It is just too painful). I also deal with household chores or help bathe kids (at which point I realize the children's bathroom is gross and disgusting, thus, wipe it down quickly while the boys soak in the tub) These days the sink is always piled with dirty dishes. :-)

This fall, my girlfriend is going to homeschool her son, and invited Charles to join them for the entire school year: 8-noon, Monday through Friday since the boys are in the same grade. I'm going to take her up on the offer. Would anyone like Oliver to join their home pre-school class, because he is very available. That would leave me Jonathan and Caroline who will both be in Classical school, so I won't be entirely responsible for their lesson plans and homework lists. Wow, this fall I might be able to get back to bread baking (assuming I remember to call an oven repair man. Anyone have a good one?)